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Before I was an online dating coach, I was an online dater.A bad boy with a guitar and tattoos always got my heart racing, but when it came to settling down, I realized that nice guys made better spouses.It either means they’re proud of acting like assholes all the time or they’re pathological liars. He’s got an agenda (usually a pretty selfish one), and he disguises it underneath the cloak of being a “nice guy.” At The Art of Charm, we’re not the least bit opposed to agendas, even ones that might be a little “selfish.” But we do urge men to be honest and above board about their intentions at all times.No one ever got laid by being a “nice guy.” The Nice Guys of Ok Cupid fail at creating rapport and sexual tension.If he calls you his lady, girl, girlfriend, or the like before saying your name, that’s a keeper.

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Are we supposed to wait forever for your stuff to drop? Even if we like you, eventually, if you don’t throw us a bone (please don’t misread that, it may end in an assault charge or at least a gross misunderstanding), we’re going to move along to someone who does. And being bitter and jaded and making generalizations about an entire gender (“Girls only like jerks!By now, everyone has probably seen the Nice Guys of Ok Cupid.If you haven’t, here’s the premise: Someone thought it would be funny to post pictures of unattractive, socially awkward men from Ok Cupid, along with painful clips from their profiles talking about how they are “nice guys.” While I can’t help but wonder what would happen if the gender roles were reversed here, it did get me thinking about “nice guys.” The Nice Guy is a girl’s best friend. In fact, he often volunteers his services even when they aren’t wanted.A guy who is nice will be there for you when he can and only if you need him, and he won’t be afraid to tell you if you’re wrong. They show up at your door bearing magazines and Kettle Chips when you’re having a hard day, and will endure hours of “Dance Moms” just to be in your presence.A Nice Guy will bend over backwards to be the kind of person you’ve always wanted, a guy who is nice will have a personality that is not forged from the ashes of your own, with interests that are entirely separate from yours. ” on the street, and don’t understand why you scowl and pull your scarf tighter around your neck. These small acts of “kindness” are just the foundation for what will inevitably turn into a rebuffed advance. Here’s the thing about being a Nice Guy: we can sniff that shit out a mile away.Hearts are not so easily bought, they are won, by guys who are nice.A guy who is nice will to go dinner at a place that was chosen by both parties, perhaps even with some friendly banter over which restaurant is preferable.First of all, talking about what a “nice guy” you are is generally a pretty clear sign you aren’t, which I think is the point of the site in the first place.It’s like guys who are always going on about how “honest” they are.They then reach the passive-aggressive conclusion women don’t like them because they are “too nice.” These are the guys who honestly believe women look for assholes.Every man with a lick of social awareness knows on some level this isn’t true. First of all, all of you “nice guys” who complain that we never go out with you? So many alleged “nice guys” who bitch, moan, and complain about who they see their female friends smooching have never mustered up the balls to ever make a move.The fact that you’re denouncing our taste in guys isn’t making you any more attractive.I had a drink with a friend the other night who spent the entire time pouting as he regaled me with the latest details of his most recent failure in the dating world. No one ever wants to date me because I’m too nice,” he whined.“Girls don’t like me because they don’t like nice guys! I’ve had this conversation multiple times with lots of my guy friends, and the one thing I always tell them is this: women like nice guys, because no one wants to be with a jerk, but there’s a difference between being a Nice Guy and being a guy who is nice. A Nice Guy is always there for you, in every situation, with a shoulder to cry on, a salve for your ire, the ultimate yes-man. Nice Guys treat friendship as a carefully calculated series of hoops that they must jump through in order to defeat the final boss, and get in your pants.




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