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My belief is that many relationship issues or breakups are often caused by either lack of communication, or doing it ineffectively.

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In addition, they will be able to listen to the other person, without interjecting, talking over, interrupting, or responding defensively. Even for the seasoned therapist such as myself who helps people on a daily basis, I have my moments where conversations in my relationship do not go as planned. The proof, however, is in the desire to be open to change, remain flexible in your thinking, and figure out what works for both people. Negotiating means that you state clearly, without fighting or blaming, how the status quo needs to change, embarking on a new direction. Over time I’ve learned to confront the infamous “red flags” when it comes to the dating world.There may have been a tiny voice inside my head that said “this doesn’t seem right,” but because I didn’t truly want to believe that was the case, I’d push it aside and move on.We all know communication in relationships is important, but in the early stages, is a tight-lipped manner a red flag signaling you to run the other way?I’d say yes, considering a block in communication is fatal in serious, long-term relationships.“The degree of block can vary with the severity or repeating of the communication stop,” Daniel Evans writes in his article, “The Importance of Communication in Relationships.” “A block in the relationship exists or will grow when communication is just flat out avoided.” Evans grew up with the notion of not wanting to upset others; however, that only propelled him to avoid communicating on touchy topics altogether.“In adult relationships, this behavior only avoided the hard issues that people have to work through for the relationship to be healthy and grow.” Along with avoidance, diversion is another troublesome communication tactic..” I hear these comments often, which is a reminder of just how universal communication difficulties are, especially in intimate relationships. These traits get in the way of good communication and thwart progress. These difficulties result in conversations that many times remain unresolved or escalate to an argument. Use your energy to take care of yourself and not to try and manage another person. Well, one of the more pet-peevish warning signs that always left me clueless was when the other person (in my situations it was a guy, but I don’t want to target the whole male species here) could not express how he felt.It’s also unfortunate when the silence goes beyond just articulating feelings, and he simply can’t communicate… Your messages and texts go ignored, and you’re left wondering how you didn’t foresee this issue to begin with.One thing people often tell me is that I am diplomatic.It has actually been suggested that I get into politics (more than once), but I think I like writing better. ” Instead of “You never make me feel…” try “I don’t usually feel…” The idea here is to lighten the burden of whatever message you are trying to get across and even take responsibility for it.It can even feel like too much work starting over with someone new.But deep down you may have a nagging feeling that something just isn’t right.




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